I am in the midst of being in a kitty hospice situation.  We were gone for two weeks, and when we returned the smaller cat was skin and bones.  Her kidneys are shutting down.  I would have let her go a couple of days ago, but she is still fighting, so I will go with her on that for as long as she wants.  I don't expect it to be long.  I am providing subQ fluids, although today, being my first attempt, did not go well.  I wasted 2ml of fluid before I got the hang of it.  She eats very little, and sleeps most of the time, coming out to climb onto my lap for snuggles, and until today was still managing to get up into the top of the cat tree.  I am finding many similarities between kitty hospice and human hospice.  Her brother is more clingy, and needs way more snuggles.  I am back to having to make lists in order to keep my head together.


As Pastor I walked this path with lots of people.  Our churches walk this path with folks many times a year.  It is a noble path, but a difficult one to walk.  The family's entire focus is on the one who is leaving.  Time away, time to be "normal", time to think of other things are very important.  I have discovered (yes, I'm aware it is a cat, but I am suddenly playing nurse as well as being her human) that one of the nicest things we might offer to hospice caregivers is either to go grocery shopping for them, or to offer to sit while they go.  I know I'm not telling you anything you don't already know, but I'm in the middle of it for just a short time, and yes, with "just a cat", so I can be in the middle and still have some perspective.




Death, O God, is a part of life.  It is a part we often dread, and work very hard to avoid, but it is something we all face both in those we love and in ourselves.  Help us to face these times with grace, and to have the courage to walk with others as they face them.  The Psalmist reminds us that there is no place we can go that you aren't already there, and that even when we walk through the valley of the shadow of death you are there.  Let that knowledge bring us peace in all the hard times of life...............Amen.

I'm leaving tomorrow for a couple of weeks away.  Not exactly vacation, but it will be very different from normal, and we are vacating our premises so I guess it qualifies as a vacation.  We'll be in a different place in Missouri, in Illinois briefly, in old family haunts in Ohio, and then in Indiana for a wedding.  I had planned to write something light and airy today, but two things have gotten in the way of that: the massacre in Orlando, and a night of not sleeping.  In addition to all those affected by the killings in Orlando we also need to remember to pray for our friend Hubert Clinard, who has entered Hospice, and for Carol Thompson, whose surgery yielded some complications that must be dealt with.
I have restless legs, which are normally under control, but sometimes I get really big uncontrollable jerking that keeps both me and by companion awake.  He left to another sleeping space, leaving me to stay awake most of the night.  As one part would quiet down, another would begin.  I found myself wishing, even asking that a particularly aggressive spot would please quiet down.  And into my head came this: "If these were silent, the very rocks themselves would cry out."  I'm still trying to figure out how that relates to my jerking muscles, but I also started thinking about which side of that am I on?  Am I a noisy disciple that the powers that be want to silence?  Or am I a rock, sitting quietly waiting for the time when those who are noisy now are too tired and I need to take over?  I don't have answers to that, either.  Maybe I'll contemplate all these questions in the middle of the night tonight.  How about you?  Are you the noisy pest for Jesus, or the one waiting in the wings to be called into action?  Whichever it is, do it well.  Others are depending on us.


How long, O Lord, until your children stop killing one another?  How long until we find better ways of dealing with disagreements?  How long until we allow others the right to simply exist?  You call your disciples to work and act and speak on your behalf, even when to do so might not be well-received.  You call us to speak truth to power, and power never likes that.  You call us to be brave, and of good courage, and it is only through your Spirit that we are able to do so.  Fill us with your Spirit that we may truly be the persons you need us to be.....Amen.